Someone Brought a Gun to My Son’s School

No tiptoeing into this one. What’s going on with students bringing guns to school?! It feels like every time I turn on the news, I’m seeing a story about a student bringing a gun to school. Now, before I venture off into this candid conversation, let's speak the truth first. The majority of schools in the country are safe, and mass shootings committed by students are not an everyday occurrence. The crisis that we are currently facing is the growing frequency of students bringing guns to schools. My wife called me with some concerning news about my oldest son’s school. She stated she received an email stating a student was arrested for bringing a gun on campus. I asked her if she was certain it was the same school our son went to, and after rereading the email, it was the high school across from his school. The district just decided to notify all parents of schools in the immediate vicinity of the incident. Fortunately, no one was hurt, but this one hit too close to home. The question rattled around in my mind, “What’s going on?” I spoke to an elementary school principal about the incident, and she hit what I believe is a major reason for the crisis that we are experiencing. Similar to social media trends, Devious Lick or Kia Challenge, it is becoming increasingly trendy to bring firearms to school. The principal and I were in firm agreement that there are students who are bringing in guns because they are being influenced to do it by others in person or through social media inspiration.  No, there has been a verifiable connection to a social media challenge. But we do have a glorification of guns in the United States, and it is not just in hip hop culture. There are plenty of groups that spend millions of dollars on legislation, policies, etc, on making guns accessible and popular. I have seen individuals on social media post guns with rap music and others with country music on. Different demographics, same AR-15. So the glorification of guns problem isn’t exclusive to one demographic or culture. The issue we are having with students bringing guns into schools hinges on these three areas: lack of knowledge and communication, accessibility, and proper conflict and emotional management. The lack of knowledge comes from students not understanding that this is a lethal force they are dealing with. In one of my favorite books, “Makes Me Want To Holler”, the author Nathan McCall spoke about his early exposure to guns. He stated that in his younger days, having and using a gun was a sign of power and respect. McCall also stated that shooting a gun gave a euphoric feeling, but once you realize what or who was on the other end of that barrel, you come down from that high. Many students have a false sense of the power that a gun wields. A gun can end someone’s life, and they don’t respawn like in a game. And if you take someone’s life, you can be held criminally liable for that action, and you have caused emotional and mental anguish for everyone involved in that situation. Students don’t always think that far ahead, and I’m willing to wager it is because many haven’t matured to that level of thinking. This knowledge about the use and safety of firearms needs to be communicated to students by parents, schools, and communities. Where do students get information if they can’t get it from a responsible source? They go to their friends or the internet, and those aren’t always reliable sources. I find it laughable that the advice or information my son tells me is being given by his classmates. I laugh because the advice or information is very incorrect and sometimes doesn't make the slightest amount of sense. So I can only imagine the information given about guns. We need to explain to students the reason guns are needed and why they may exist in someone’s home. Ultimately, parents and guardians with guns in the home need to explain to their children that firearms are not for them to access and use. That leads me to the second area, accessibility. I personally have two safes in my home to store firearms. My children are aware of the safes with firearms, and they operate with the understanding that they are under no condition to open or play with them. That is a practical approach taken in my household and many other households. I am aware that students are accessing guns outside of the house, and that issue is connected to the areas mentioned previously. Why does a student feel the need to obtain a gun? We have to start communicating with our students early to catch any signs of distress or incorrect information that can lead to dangerous situations. Instructing our youth about the purpose of a gun and communicating questions and scenarios with them about it. Have the hard conversations about why and when a gun would be necessary for and adult to use. I also encourage parents to know who their children’s friends are, their families, etc. This is not a call to be overbearing or investigate every single person or house, but a call to be vigilant. It is important to know who and what influences your child. Let's not give a reason to seek access to guns by having conversations. Accessibility brings us to the final area to be addressed, which is conflict and emotional management. Students face conflicts at school, online, in the neighborhood, you name it. These conflicts can spark emotional outbursts between students, faculty, and other individuals. If a student doesn’t know much about conflict resolution or how to operate with a sense of emotional intelligence, the chances of them acting rashly are higher. Combine rash actions with accessibility to guns. You have just created a student who could use a firearm to prove a false sense of power to his/her classmates. Students need to be taught healthy ways to resolve conflict and de-escalation practices. This should also include positive outlets for emotional expressions whenever they are feeling discomfort towards a situation or individual. Guns, violence, and crash outs are not viable outlets to a sustainable future. I see school districts investing in metal detectors, and I think that is good. This helps repel outside threats coming into the schools. But how are we dealing with the potential issues inside the building? Are the districts investing in programs that are more preventive versus reactive? It would be better if we stopped a student from bringing a weapon in the first place. Let's develop programs teaching about creating safe places for expressions, debunking the glorification of guns in various cultures, and how to effectively cohabitate with people who get on your nerves. The metal detectors are an endgame response. The reason why I say that is because if the school is catching the student in the act, then we have missed the signs of what led to the student bringing the gun in the first place. We are at a pivotal time in our nation where we can no longer quarrel over politics when students' lives are in danger. The change toward safety starts in our households, neighborhoods, schools, and communities.